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Monday, August 02, 2004


"The complications of life caused by yuppee scum"
Braden Files is tied for first with Geitner Simmons' blog as the best under-read blog I know of. They are both real treasures, but with entirely different focus and content.

Today Braden talks about what the "yuppee scum" have done to a simple cup of joe, and how agravating it is to try to get a plain cup of coffee at Starbucks en route home from a "really bad parachute landing at Ft. Lopburi, Thailand."

And he quotes Jackie Mason on Starbucks.

If I said to you, "I have a great idea for a business. I'll open a whole new type of coffee shop. Instead of charging 60 cents for coffee. I'll charge $2.50, $3.50, $4.50, & $5.50. Not only that, I'll have no tables, no chairs, no water, no free refills, no waiters, no busboys, serve it in cardboard cups, and have the customer clean it up for 20 minutes after they're finished."

Would you say to me, "That's the greatest idea for a business I ever heard! We can open a chain of these all over the world!" No, you would put me right into a sanitarium.

And it's burnt coffee! It's burnt coffee at Starbucks, be honest about it. If you get burnt coffee in a coffee shop, you call a cop. You say, "It's the bottom of the pot. I don't drink from the bottom of the pot. But when it's burnt at Starbucks, they say, "Oh, it's a special roast. It's a special bean from Argentina....."
Folks, it's time to face facts: Jackie's right. Starbucks emphasizes the "bucks" part of its name. Their coffee is terrible. Give them up and do what I do - roast your own coffee at home at a fraction of the cost and yielding magnitudes better coffee. Before long you'll save enough money to open your own Starbucks store. No, wait . . . .

by Donald Sensing, 8/2/2004 03:01:23 PM. Permalink |  





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